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I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

Rita Rudner       
Albert Einstein
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invaribly they are both disappointed.

Albert Einstein       
I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.

Marie Corelli       
I'm jealous of every man not married to you.

Al Bundy       
Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Jackie Mason       
Men are simple things. They can survive a whole weekend with only three things: beer, boxer shorts and batteries for the remote control.

Diana Jordan       






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