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Mark Twain
Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement.

Mark Twain       
Pretty women make us buy beer. Ugly women make us drink beer.

Al Bundy       
Winston Churchill
I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.

Winston Churchill       
A fat woman came into the shoe store today. Wanted a pair of shoes for a christmas party. I told her to stand on her hands, put a star in her butt and go as the world's largest, ugliest tree!

Al Bundy       





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