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Mark Twain
Of all the animals, man is the only one that lies.

Mark Twain       
Yogi Berra©
The future ain't what it used to be.

Yogi Berra       
It's the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter.

Marlene Dietrich       
Cary Grant©
I pretended to be somebody I wanted to be and I finally became that person. Or he became me. Or we met at some point.

Cary Grant       
I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There's a knob called 'brightness', but it doesn't work.

Gallagher       
Woody Allen©
Last night I discovered a new form of oral contraceptive. I asked a girl to go to bed with me and she said no.

Woody Allen       






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