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Humor quotes

194 quotes about humor



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Where's the "Any" key?

Homer Simpson       
It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon playing golf.

Henry Aaron       
Woody Allen©
If you want to make God laugh, tell him your future plans.

Woody Allen       
Mark Twain
What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin.

Mark Twain       
Zsa Zsa Gabor©
I never hated a man enough to give him diamonds back.

Zsa Zsa Gabor       
Bob Hope
I love flying. I've been to almost as many places as my luggage.

Bob Hope       



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