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Please, Peg, if you have any feelings for me, don't make me make love to you.

Al Bundy       
Clint Eastwood©
There's only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I'll get married again.

Clint Eastwood       
Sorry, Peg, I didn't hear you. I was thinking of killing myself.

Al Bundy       
I am a very committed wife. And I should be committed too - for being married so many times.

Elizabeth Taylor       
I've been married too many times. How terrible to change children's affiliations, their affections – to give them the insecurity of placing their trust in someone when maybe that someone won't be there next year.

Elizabeth Taylor       
Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Jackie Mason       






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