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Mark Twain
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.

Mark Twain       
Please, Peg, if you have any feelings for me, don't make me make love to you.

Al Bundy       
Oh, Lord, if I ever meant anything to you, please let me fall asleep before she thinks of sex.

Al Bundy       
Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!

Homer Simpson       
I can't give you a sure-fire formula for success, but I can give you a formula for failure: try to please everybody all the time.

Herbert Bayard Swope       



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