Homer Simpson Quotes

Trying is the first step towards failure.

Okay, brain. You don't like me, and I don't like you, but let's get through this thing and then I can continue killing you with beer.

Homer Simpson

I'm not normally a religious man, but if you're up there, save me, Superman!

Homer Simpson

Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.

Homer Simpson

Bart, a woman is like a beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one!

Homer Simpson

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day.

Homer Simpson

Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

Homer Simpson

I am not crazy. It's the TV that's crazy. Aren't you, TV?

Homer Simpson

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